Before I go on with this post, I just wanted to let everyone know that Bill Amend, the creater of Fox Trot has decided to go to Sundays only beginning December 31. That sucks.
I found this in the paper this morning...
WHAT A (____) YEAR! Haven't written your holiday newsletter yet? Never fear: Just fill in the blanks.
By Tim Engle from The KC Star
Dear family and friends,
We hate to send out the standard Christmas "newsletter," but this one is different from all the rest because at least ____ percent of it is actually true! Ha ha.
Well, 2006 has turned out to be another truly ____ year. I think of my job as not just a career; it's more of a ____. Remember in high school when I was named person most likely to ____? That prediction couldn't be more ____.
There is one co-worker, ____, that I'm having issues with, but I will exact my revenge at the holiday party. Let's just say that ____'s "eggnog" will be more like ____nog. Tee hee!
The children are doing so well. Popular, always make the honor roll, volunteer at the nursing home. Of course, those are the neighbor kids. Kidding! No, actually, _____ was the inspiration for a new municipal skateboarding law, and ____ can download any song or movie for free, legal or otherwise. We're very proud.
You probably heard about the police coming out to our house back in _____. It was all a mix-up. What neighbors heard was _____ and me rehearsing a scene from "____" for our community theater. We sent you an invite to opening night, didn't we?
Healthwise, you could call this the Year of the ____. It is so not true that no one comes down with ____ anymore!
Did you go anywhere fun on vacation? We tried one of those one-tank trips and actually made it all the way to ____, home of the World's Largest ____. But we had failed to budget enough money to refill the tank (____ing oil companies!) so we were forced to ____ to get back home.
Here in KC, the Plaza lights are glowing again, and the Chiefs seem poised to make it all the way to ____ this year. Of course, we can't attend the games in person anymore, ever since that day we were tailgating and inadvertently barbecued a ____. Too many beers! :-)
No doubt you heard about the sports complex's rolling roof (a ____ idea), which failed at the polls. But Clay Chastain's latest ____ actually passed. How did your candidates do? We supported ____, so of course we were ____ with the results.
Well, that hits the year's ____lights. You should come visit! Like they say, the sun always shines here in ____. Granted, our home is no showplace-some of the neighbors call it Case de ____ - but we'd love to see you anyway!
Happy holidays, and wishing you nothing but ____ in 2007.
____ and the ____ clan
5 comments:
LOL!
Jeff has a distant cousin in OK that always sends us a Christmas letter that is just full of it. We've been "treated" to all their vacations including trips to New York for Christmas shopping, an artist's rendition of their vacation home in Crested Butte, the remodeling of their home, complete with a wine cellar... Finally, Jeff emailed them last year. He told them that he was reminded who they were by his mom but that he didn't know them and didn't care about their opulent life style and, while he wished them well, they needed to take him off their Christmas list.
He was actually very nice about it but in the previous years, he really did make up tons of the above type of Christmas letters to send to them.
We get a couple of those which is why I dislike the holiday newsletters. It's a "here's how my life is better than yours" type of thing.
Then there is the letter from Jeff's aunt. LOL, it was sooo depressing. It was a recap of all the operations, deaths and tragedy of the year. Wow. Funny, it came from the same town as the other one. I remember Grandma sent newsletters. They are so cool to read now but I wonder if everyone else thought the same thing about their cruise around the world, etc.
That letter would be even more fun if you let your kids play Mad Libs with it.
-- SJ
Post a Comment